Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Another Step

Tomorrow is the day, Peyton’s third anniversary in Heaven.  I don’t know how a day on the calendar can make such a difference, but it does.  The time is passing and we are still here without him.  We are missing him terribly. 

The past two anniversaries, Tom & I have taken the day offHowever, Tom and I have decided we are going to work tomorrow.    I don’t want to take this step.  It is a step further away from the grief and closer to healing and wholeness, but I don’t want to do it. 

My flesh is screaming, “Everyone will understand!! Stay home!!!”

My flesh will not dominate me and I will quiet annihilate satan’s whispers of self pity with the Word of God.  I looked up the definition to annihilate (I was really checking to see if I spelled it right) it means - to reduce to utter ruin or nonexistence 

God directs my path and tomorrow that path leads me to work.  I’m sure I will shed some tears, but my mind will be focused on God’s promises and His grace and His love.

I’ll let you know how it went. 

Now for some pictures of the boy I love so much.

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I don’t think I’ve ever posted a pic like this.  It was seconds before he went to Heaven.

Peyton's ride 001

 

This one is one of my faves.  Big smile, that’s how the majority of my memories are of him. 

Peyton and Dusty

hair5

Thanks for reading :) (and praying, and commenting)

13 comments:

Shelly Taylor said...

I wil be praying for you. If I was in the office I would even give you a hug...and we know that's something special. <3 your faith and strength.

Lisa Johnson said...

He has your smile! When he smiles, his whole face lights up!

Erin H said...

Love you guys so much...I will never forget Peyton...can hardly wait til we are all together again....what a day that is going to be.

Pam said...

I will be praying for you today. Big hugs for you.

Love these pictures too. Very surreal that some are seconds before heaven.

Cortney Parker said...

I love you Becky!! You can do it! Sending big hugs your way!!!

Jake said...

I admire your boldness and faith to shut the enemy up and go to work today. You and Tom are victorious!!! I'm sure Peyton is smiling!

Filled to the Brim said...

Yes, I'm sure Peyton is glad you are taking these steps to recovery! He is happy and he wants you to be happy too! =]

chippy said...

Praying for you & Tom... day & tomorrow & the next.
Knowing that 'God is the God who does what is right, and He will smooth out the path ahead of you' (Is. 26:7)

Rhonda Adams said...

Thank you for being willing to follow God and share your heart..YOU are making a difference in peoples lives,because you decided to allow God to work in you. The fact that you open up and share Peyton, shows what Satan used to destroy lives God is getting the Glory and people are making the choice to serve Him...Why because You made a choice.....Thank you Becky

Kelley said...

I have been thinking about you all week and praying for you. I knew that this day would be coming around again and would be hard. The pictures you posted made me cry. He is beautiful. That smile is something else.

MarshaMarshaMarsha said...

I am praying for you, Becky!

It is hard sometimes to choose to press on... even though we know it doesn't mean that we have moved on!

He's a handsome young man. :) I can't wait to meet him one day!

Much love to you today (and every day)!

Mona said...

Love the post and love the pics! He is actually quite an amazing combination of you and Tom. Another day/year closer to the day when TIME will never again mean a thing!! I bet he feels like he's only been in Heaven a millisecond!

Jennifer said...

So...how did it go? Just how did God send you a hug, step in a meet you personally, and bless this day of Peyton's heavenly birthday? Wish I had stopped by earlier - but I know you were covered in prayer. Sending you an extra hug today...

Love the pictures - especially that smiler:)