A Whirlwind of Social Activity

Maybe “whirlwind” is overstating my social life just a tad, but we have had some fun times the past two nights.

What do a Horse Trainer, an investment broker, a realtor, a school teacher, a nurse, a lab tech and a business owner all have in common?

They were all at my house for a small reunion. A few of my high school classmates came to dinner Tuesday night. Lots of laughs and catching up. It is good to have friends that have known you forever. You only have to tell half of a story and everybody starts laughing….except the spouses. (Sorry honey, at least you got a home cooked meal)

Tonight, Tom and I met some people for a birthday celebration. Andrew is 15!!!!

That was some tasty cake. Strawberry cake with camouflage icing, yummy.

This is where we ate.

It’s one of those Japanese style places, where the chef cooks the food at your table. Very entertaining and goooooooood!!

Stay tuned for the rest of the story. After we ate, we went and visited someone special. I’ll give a little hint; he weighs 8 lbs 13 oz and is 22.5 inches long. I’m ready to introduce him, but his story isn’t quite ready yet.

Peyton’s Jacket

I have given away many of Peyton’s things.  I took pictures of anything that was important to Tom & I and for the most part let them go.  I did keep a particular jacket. 

Peyton and I went shopping together for him a new jacket right before his last Christmas with us.  This is what he picked out.

As we were looking through the racks, he said, “ I need to find one that looks good with my hat.”  He was talking about his cowboy hat.  I think he found the right one.

The girl in the picture is my cousin’s daughter from California.

It was very cold the day of his funeral.  I carried this jacket and put it around my legs during the graveside service. 

As the anniversary date rolls around again, I am having to fight the emotions more often.  I tell myself it is just a date on the calendar, but it is more.  The smells, wood burning in the stove, the winter meals I cook, etc. make it feel like I have stepped back in time 2 yrs.  We basically do the same things year after year and we replay the same routines only Peyton is not here to fill his role.  The last memories are so strong, I sometimes wonder when he is coming home. 

I don’t have words for myself that will resolve these feelings.  I do know that God is always with me and will never leave me.  I will see Peyton again.

I know that the coming year holds new and exciting challenges for Tom and I.  We will embrace them and fulfill the call God has on our lives.  I am excited about what He would have us do.

Christmas – the 2nd Time Around

Christmas this year was easier than last year, but it was hard just the same. It was hard to keep my mind focused on the here and now. My mind kept wandering to the way things used to be. My father-in-law has been in Heaven since 1996. I kept thinking about how he always helped my mother-in-law Kerrol with the dishes after dinner and how he got down in the floor to play with the grandkids. I know without a doubt that he and Peyton are together in Heaven. I am tired of being separated from them and I know Tom is too.

We had a white Christmas, which is very unusual for us. I heard someone say it had been in the mid 70s since we had one. A friend of mine said Peyton probably talked God into giving it to us. I don’t know how things work in Heaven, but if anyone could talk Him into it, Peyton could. Peyton would say, “Aw come on, You know You want to.” and then smile that big Peyton smile. I miss that smile.

This is what our place looked like this morning.

I know Peyton is not missing out on anything, but I am. I wanted to see him rough housing in the snow with the cousins and begging to ride the 4 wheeler today. Even though I’ve been living without him for almost 2 years, there are times I feel like he’s in his room or out with friends and I am waiting for him to burst through the door and tell me about his day.

We did have a Merry Christmas in spite of the emotional stuff and I hope all of you did too.

Can you feel the heat coming off of this puppy? Tom kept a fire going all day and I just had to show it to you!!!

Christmas Movie

This has been my favorite Christmas movie for a very long time.

The message is relevant and makes you think.  “What would the world be like if I was never born?”  I  hope I have a positive impact like George Bailey or even better……..like Jesus.

I have this sign hanging over a doorway in our home……just a little reminder.

Spirit > Flesh = Victory

I’ve been experiencing some difficult emotional times.  This time of year is especially hard.  On top of missing Peyton, I  have some really big projects to finish at work before the end of the year and it’s Christmas and I’ve allowed these things to stress me out. 

I’ve been very agitated.  Co-workers will ask me questions and I will smile and answer.  The whole time I am speaking, I wonder, “Who’s voice is coming out of my mouth?”  Why are these people so stupid?” What can I say so they will leave me alone?”  Other times, I will give scathing looks and they probably know what I am thinking.  After losing control, I’ve cried and told myself I am a failure.  I know who this is

Rev 12:10

And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.

Even the times when my words don’t match my negative thoughts, I know I am wrong.  It is not my co-workers (or the checker at Wal-Mart) that need to change, it is me. 

Thinking these things over has brought me revelation.  I cannot will myself out of grief.  My flesh cannot control my flesh.  Only my spirit can control my flesh.  I must strengthen my inner man with the Word of God.  Greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world.

I John 4:4

Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world

This next scripture is from the Message bible.  I've started reading this translation along with NIV and I really like it.

Rom 13:11-14

But make sure that you don't get so absorbed and exhausted in taking care of all your day-by-day obligations that you lose track of the time and doze off, oblivious to God. The night is about over, dawn is about to break. Be up and awake to what God is doing! God is putting the finishing touches on the salvation work he began when we first believed. We can't afford to waste a minute, must not squander these precious daylight hours in frivolity and indulgence, in sleeping around and dissipation, in bickering and grabbing everything in sight. Get out of bed and get dressed! Don't loiter and linger, waiting until the very last minute. Dress yourselves in Christ, and be up and about!

Dressing myself in Christ is not a physical act nor is it “making up my mind” to do it.  Deciding may be the first step, but it cannot be accomplished in my own strength.  Using the Word and relying on the Greater One inside me, is the only way I am going to be More than a Conqueror. 

I don’t usually post so much, but I needed it to organize my thoughts about the turmoil going on inside me.  Typing on this blog clarifies things for me.  I want to confess things and expose them and rid myself of them. 

p.s. I love my co-workers, they are a huge blessing to me and a constant source of love and support.

DIM – Do it Myself

Update: I just added a link from another blog. It is DIY day at A Soft Place to Land. Click on the links and check out the other DIY projects.

First of all I want to say, I am not a crafty person. Once in awhile I’ll run across something that interests me and I might try it. I’ve been wanting a Christmas village made from paper for several years. (I know, who wants a paper village?) Last year I found a couple of buildings at Cracker Barrel. I decided to make my own to add to my collection.

I bought buildings at Hobby Lobby that looked like this.

I added some color.

Then I added the important part……glitter. First the roof,

then the rest of the building, with a really fine sparkly glitter. (Martha Stewart brand; not that I’m partial to Martha, it’s what my mom had and it was FREE!) It’s hard to see in the pic, but it’s there.

Here are the homemade ones next to the store bought. A subtle difference, LOL. I had fun doing them.

You can buy several shapes and sizes of these houses at Hobby Lobby. I thought a cute idea would be to decorate one like a gingerbread house. You could keep it year after year.

If you haven’t checked it out yet, click on the Nester Tour of Homes button on the upper left. It will take you to a list of links that will take you to people’s homes all decorated for Christmas. Lots of beautiful decorations and great ideas.

Thanks for reading. I hope you leave a comment. Merry Christmas!!!!!!

Am I Obsessed?

Last night I had a dream about something really cool.  Some teenagers had found this rock quarry where they could swim.  When they showed it to me, I sat down on the rocks to put my feet in the water.  I then realized the rock I was sitting on was soft.  The whole thing was made out of plastic coated foam, like those really expensive mats you float on in a pool.  In the dream, the thing most on my mind was………..WHERE IS MY CAMERA?  I NEED TO BLOG ABOUT THIS!!!!!!!    Do you guys do this too? Or am I obsessed…….or a little nutty?

Things Come Up.

I found this in my bag of empty boxes that I was using to wrap Christmas presents in.

I cried.

I took a picture of it.

I tore it off and wrapped a present in the box.

Cowboy Stuff

I am blessed with great friends. 

Kayli took pictures of Peyton’s cowboy gear for me.  I use Snapfish.com when I have prints made.  While picking out which pictures to print, I saw that they made note cards.  I had some of those printed to use for thank you notes when people donate to the Peyton Jackson Memorial Scholarship fund.

The orange item in the pictures is Peyton’s chaps.  He loved those chaps so much.  My friend Annette is a very generous person and had just started sponsoring Peyton in the rodeo.  She paid for those chaps; I know she is glad she did.  I am forever grateful.  He was an incredibly blessed and happy young man all his days on this earth.  Especially happy the last sixth months, because of the people I just mentioned.

Here is another slide show.  These are only a few of the pictures she took.  She worked very hard and I appreciate it more than she can ever know.

 

Please don’t be offended by the flag.  The boys around here think of it as their history, not hate.  I know it can offend and I tried to explain that to Peyton and I did not allow him to have one.  The flag in the picture was given to us by his friends who had signed it.

This is the picture I used for the note cards.  I think it represents Peyton, without being too much.

Thanks for reading.

FYI

I ran across this on the internet. It may save you a lot of shopping time. This item was inducted into the Toy Hall of Fame in November 2008. I didn't see any commercials for it, but I'm sure it was a hot item. Probably is this year too.




Yes, it's a stick. You can go to the website here.

As Promised – Festive and Joyous

Welcome Nester Tour of Homes!  I had already posted this a couple of weeks ago.  I wanted to spruce it up a bit and I changed some things around.  Hope you enjoy and thanks for coming on the tour!!!!

Tom & I worked diligently and got the house decorated for Christmas the weekend after Thanksgiving. I took some pics and made some slide shows. I hope you enjoy them!

This first slide show is the dining room.

Christmas in the Kitchen!!

This is a slideshow of the big tree in the living room. There are lots of special ornaments on it, especially the tree topper. If you roll over the picture it will give you the title and stop the slides, if you want to look at it slower.

This is a new addition to our Christmas decorations. This is the tree we put in our bedroom. I had to think about it for awhile whether I was going to do it or not. I thought maybe it was going too far. I don’t think so. I hope you like it.

My plan is to CELEBRATE the holidays. I have to. God gave us the Greatest Gift of All. This Gift is the reason I KNOW I will be reunited with my son. Putting together posts like this and decorating a Christmas tree with Peyton’s pictures on it, make me FEEL like a mom. I am acknowledging my son’s life and it feels good. I know I am always his mom, but he doesn’t need me and that makes it hard to feel like a mom. Thanks for reading. I hope you liked the pictures!!!

P.S. This post was incredibly easy to do. I used slide.com (thanks Trish) and Live Writer. I may have gone a little overboard on using 3 different styles of slide shows…….but I wanted to try them all!!! I spent a lot more time last year on a Christmas post using Blogger. Importing and then dragging the pictures where you wanted them was a pain.

P.S.S.  I changed up this post just a smidge for the NESTER TOUR OF HOMES.  I ended up using 4 slide shows instead of three.

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!

(You’re the first person I’ve said that to this year!)