Sunday, July 12, 2009

Football Program

Every year the school publishes a football program. In it are pictures of the football teams, cheerleaders, band etc. Parents and businesses buy 1/4, 1/2 or full page ads and advertise their businesses or put pictures of their kids in it. I had planned on waiting until Peyton's Senior yr before I bought an ad. We bought a full page last year. If you click on it, you can see it better.

A friend of Peyton's put it together for me. I have been looking through pictures tonight trying to come up with what I want to do this year. I want it to be about Peyton's friends. They are all graduating this year. I have been having an emotional time here lately. Today marks 18 months since Peyton moved to Heaven. That, coupled with looking through pictures for the program was a hard combination. I have cried a lot tonight. I miss him and I want Peyton here. I don't feel like talking myself out of it.

I have been so spoiled in my life, blessing after blessing. I appreciated every one of them. I have never wanted something as bad as wanting to see Peyton and not gotten it.

I am going to bed now. I will get up tomorrow; face the grief down and put satan under my feet.

As Scarlett O'Hara says, "After all, tomorrow is another day."

okay, that's funny.


dar said...

Beck, you're the best!!! I love you more every day!

Kelley said...

I hope tomorrow is a better. It is a wonderful thing what you are doing in the football program! Just from briefly reading your blog I can tell you are a sweetheart!

Kelley said...

Thanks for commenting on my blog. We brought our Razorback "tent" for the beach. We had chairs underneath for my parents and his parents to use. There were tents from Texas A&M, Oklahoma, Auburn, and lots from Alabama. Our "tent" was the only Arkansas one we saw. It was a great sun blocker for my little one that was playing in the sand. We kept it there the entire week. It was neat to see all of the SEC sports fans around us.

Mona said...

I love you, Becky! I love your honesty, your determination, and how you lay out the rawness of the deepest parts of yourself for others to see. And I do believe it ministers a grace to those who hear - because even in your lowest moments, it is filled with hope and faith!

You are funny too! I think Landon is quite funny as well. mmmmmm, maybe you and he should team up and take it on the road . . . .hahahahaha